'Self-Compassion' Can Help Divorced People Heal 09/25/11
SUNDAY, Sept. 25 (HealthDay News) -- Self-compassion can help
the newly divorced get through one of the most difficult periods of
their lives, researchers suggest.
They explained that self-compassion -- a combination of kindness
toward oneself, recognition of common humanity, and the ability to
let painful emotions pass -- "can promote resilience and positive
outcomes in the face of divorce."
The University of Arizona researchers studied 38 men and 67
women with an average age of 40 who were married for more than 13
years and were divorced for an average of three to four months.
Those with higher levels of self-compassion were able to recover
faster from the emotional impact of divorce.
The study appears in an upcoming issue of the journal
The findings could prove useful in helping people better cope
with the desolation of separation and divorce, the researchers
"We're not interested in the basic statement, 'People who are coping better today do better nine months from now.' That doesn't help anybody," said study co-author David Sbarra in a journal press release. The surprising part, he said, is that when he looked at a lot of different positive characteristics, such as self-esteem, optimism, or ease with relationships, "this one characteristic -- self-compassion -- uniquely predicts good outcomes."
"It's not easy to say, 'Be less anxious,'" Sbarra continued. "You can't change your personality so easily. What you can change is your stance with respect to your experience." If divorced people are able to view their loss as part of the wider human experience and accept feelings of hurt or jealousy without judgment, Sbarra said, people may feel less anxious and isolated.
"This study opens a window for how we can potentially cultivate self-compassion among recently separated adults," Sbarra said.
The Canadian Mental Health Association has more about
coping with divorce.
Copyright © 2011
. All rights reserved.
Please be aware that this information is provided to supplement the care provided by your physician. It is neither intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice. CALL YOUR HEALTHCARE PROVIDER IMMEDIATELY IF YOU THINK YOU MAY HAVE A MEDICAL EMERGENCY. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider prior to starting any new treatment or with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.